Monday, August 15, 2005
Will That Be on the Rocks?
Allen dragged me kicking and screaming to a wedding of a friend this weekend. Getting dressed up and wearing high heels in 100+ degree heat is not my idea of a good time. What I wanted to be doing was sitting on my ass, preferrably at the beach, contemplating which book/magazine I wanted to read first and what sort of seafood to have for dinner. Instead, I was dragged to a church, where I surprising a.) didn't hate the service and b.) didn't burst into flame.
It was a bit stressful getting there, as first we frantically searched for (and didn't find) my necklace. When we finally left the house, we were terrifically late. Partway down the road, Allen realized that we forgot the CAMERA, so we had to turn around and get that, and then we were officially FRIGHTENINGLY late, as Allen had been asked to give the first reading and it would have been embarrasing if he wasn't there.
We actually made it with five minutes to spare, but I spent the first half of the service trying to a.) not throw up and b.) cease sweating. I was successful in the former, but not so much the latter.
The reception was a full two hours after the ceremony, so we went to a near-by chain restaurant and had some drinks and snacks beforehand. As I mentioned last week, I was nervous about the reception because some old roommates of mine were supposed to be there, but they no-showed, so the rest of the evening went pretty smoothly.
I proceeded straight to the bar, where I spent a goodly portion of the evening, emptying out the contents of my wallet. The first time I sidled up to order my standard whisky sour starter, there was a very serious young man of about 11 - 13 years of age just ahead of me. He pulled out his wallet, and said to the bartender, "A shot of grenadine, please." The bartender was of course horrified and, while pouring him the shot, said, "You know that's pure sugar, don't you?" to which the kid replied, "I wouldn't have it any other way."
I am proud to say that I actually managed to NOT snort into my drink at this point.
That was pretty much the most bizarre portion of the evening, except the part when the groom asked for audience participation and had everyone sing a camp song about a moose who, apparently, fell asleep in the water and then decomposed. That was pretty weird.
Also, I really had fun dancing with my friends Dawn and Ian. Dawn is pregnant and just starting to show - Ian and I kept trying to get her to order our drinks but she wouldn't do it. Ian and I were throughly digusted with the music the "DJ" chose, it was like he put in "Cheesy Wedding Songs Vol. 1" and went home. But once we each had a shot and some of the Inglenook table wine, we got our "Super Freak" on. I certainly paid for all that leaping around the next day, as I could barely walk around on my left foot.
I think I could actually use a shot of grenadine right about now.