Wedding Addendum

Tori, you're absolutely right, I didn't post about your wedding. I was waiting for pictures, and now I have some! Not the ones I took, of course, but the ones your HUSBAND'S (weird!) father took!

I have been to several weddings this year, but this was the one I was most looking forward too. Tori and Dan got married in the Old German Church in Waldoboro, Maine, which was a beautiful place (if somewhat adamant that you not write on the walls) and very charming. By "charming" I mean that it had an outhouse. The rain held off until most people got into the church, which was good, but after that was pretty much unmerciless. The ceremony started 30 minutes late because there was an accident on Rte 1, but eventually things started, and once they did they went off without a hitch. The readers (I was one) were pretty nervous in our little box at the front of the room, but we all got through our pieces without great embarrassment to self.

The ceremony was traditional and perfect for the couple, not too flowery, and not super religious so it didn't feel exclusive. The officiant did say, as she did at rehearsal, that Tori asked us all there that day to be witnesses (not Dan and Tori) which prompted Jim (a reader) to whisper "Just Tori", causing the readers to stifle various nervous giggles, but I wouldn't have noticed if Jim hadn't mentioned it. The couple didn't write their own vows, thankfully. There's a reason someone is supposed to prompt you, folks. It's because you're either going to be a.) too shaky to be understood b.) too quiet to be understood or c.) so sappy that we wish you weren't understood. The bride put it best herself when she proclaimed that she would NOT be saying something along the lines of "Oh, Dan, you're so great, and I love you my big warm blanket of man," a quote which Allen still hasn't stopped repeating.

The reception was at the Rockland Elks Lodge, which was very surreal (for me, anyway) as I had my high school prom there, and I'm pretty sure at least one of my uncles gets hammered there on a regular basis.

The reception hall was dominated by not one, not two, but THREE chocolate fountains, into which guests dipped all matter of sweets, and then went and sat at their tables unable to move. It was so funny watching people try not to rush the chocolate the second it came on, and then for the rest of the evening you could catch people at various tables just STARING at it, like it prehistoric man staring into the flame, or, perhaps, like wedding guests in a food coma.

The event was the first time Tori, Emma, David and I were all together in years, and it was reassuring to see that everyone fell back into our old patterns. Dave used the disposible camera on the table to take pictures of odd things in the room (have you developed those yet, Tori?), Emma's eye almost swelled shut for no reason, she fell over because her dress was too long, then knocked a drink out of my hand and down the front of her dress, Dave claimed it was bound to happen and now she had gotten it out of the way so she could relax, Tori kept disappearing to smoke, I got loud and took to many pictures, and made fun of Emma too much. (Not nice!) Most importantly, we laughed and danced and talked about how beautiful the bride looked, and how handsome the groom, and harrassed them with endless photos and hugs.

(Also we made fun of the dj, who voluntarily called himself DJ Marky Mark.)

Tori's going to read this, and will mostly likely accuse me of something or other, but I have to say that she was absolutely stunning in her wedding gown, and that together with the HUGE smile she had on her face all night made everyone who looked at her say "Doesn't she look beautiful?"

I think everyone there had a great time because we were all 100% behind this relationship. And because Dan's Uncle Dick looks JUST LIKE Tim Curry. Seriously! It's crazy!

Honestly, though, I don't know of any two people more suited to one another, who are both such worthwhile people, and who deserve so much happiness.

I love you guys! Tons!

I'd Love to See Pixelated-Godfather....

No, I really, really wouldn't. But you should check out this pixelated version of Star Wars. You really, really should.

Trinity Brewhouse Effect

Here is a picture (taken by Zak) of Kendra and Zak's kitten that Zak took in order to make a submission to www.stuffonmycat.com.

The kitten's name is Trinity, which is actually short for Trinity Brewhouse Effect, which is the name given to a phenomenon that many of you may have experienced. The Trinity Brewhouse Effect generally occurs within groups of 3 or more, though it can happen with 2, and I suppose with 1, but only if you have serious alcohol issues.

The Trinity Brewhouse Effect occurs when it's time to go, which means you have to finish up your beers. There is always one person who has nearly a full beer left in these situations, which means that someone else invariably is going to get another beer, you know, to drink while their friend is finishing his beer. But then someone else finishes their beer, and, after hanging out for a while, sees that HE has time for another beer, and so on, and so on, until everyone has had about 2-3 more beers than they meant to.

This also works with pitchers.

To get back on topic, this is a great cat that I had the pleasure of hanging out with for a week, and here she is with stuff on her. Albeit, a small amount of stuff. But stuff nonetheless.

Ridiculously Cute

I know, I know I owe you all a wedding post. I left you hanging there. But I just had to post this because it's so damn cute and I WANT THEM. But they are not for sale, alas.

Cutest incarnation of rock band EVAR!
The crafter who created these is likely the most amazing person who has ever existed.

Four Hours and a Wedding

I anticipate getting about 4 hours of sleep tonight, as I still have laundry in the dryer and have not yet packed and we're supposed to be in Maine by 9am so I can say hi to my dad before he goes to work.

Then I have to go shopping because I have NOTHING to wear to the wedding (Did I even MENTION Tori and Dan's wedding??) that qualifies as WARM in any way shape or form. And I'm pretty sure I don't have any shoes, but that just means that I'm screwed because I could never find those in Maine anyway.

Basically, I will not be around all weekend. As per usual. So, I just wanted to take this time to tell all of my friends, ALL of whom I have been neglecting HORRIBLY lately, that I am so, so sorry. I owe you all long, explanatory phone calls, and visits, and cookies, and hugs, and whatever else you ask for me to be in your good graces.

I love you all, I am not mad at anyone, I am just scheduled up to my eyeballs. Apparently, I am trying to prove once and for all that I cannot be in two places at the same time.

I need a doppelganger. Actually, no. According to dictionary.com, I would be looking for a ghostly copy of myself. I was thinking that a doppelganger was more of a look-a-like type. You know, someone who looked like me, but wasn't me, so potentially everything she attempted wouldn't be a total disaster.

Anyway. It's past 11pm, and I'm pretty sure I'm shrinking something as we speak, so I will talk to you all later.

Postcards From Near the Edge (Almost)

A while ago, Lizzy sent me a link to this postcard, knowing how much I love all things Mythbuster-related. Ever since, I've been meaning to post something about Jon's amazing postcards. I have read each one of them, and wish that I was cool enough to get one in the mail.

And for those of you who are sick of all my blathering on about cats, read Jon's dogblog. It is teh funny.

Stuff On My Cat

Jesus God. My cats would put up with this nonsense for about five nanoseconds. Actually, Loki is currently on anti-anxiety drugs (I'm jealous) and I could probably torture him for a minute or two.

One of my favorites is this picture on the left here, but there are some seriously seranged photos on this website. I also love the kitty in the pot on the stove.

What do you guys think?

CIRCUS MAXIMUS

I haven't had a chance to say much lately - not because I don't have much to say, but because there has been so much going on and I don't even know where to start. Also, I wasn't sure if I wanted this blog to occasionally turn into a full-on Angela disclosure type of thing.

I've finally decided that this is acting like writer's block, because it's really keeping me from writing at all. So, those of you who aren't interested in gory family details, please read one of the excellent webcomics I have linked to on the left.

For the rest of you - my Circus Family has EXPLODED over the past week!

Where to even begin!

During the latter half of our week in Seattle, I got a phone call from Eric that I handed off to Allen because a.) I didn't feel good and b.) I was trying to take a nap. I could hear Eric yelling on the other end of the phone...it didn't sound good. When Allen filled me in, I felt like calling my friends, telling them to sell my house, and then asking them to sell the proceeds so I could begin my new life in the Pacific Northwest.

Turns out Eric went to go visit Ivan (the other, younger brother) at work, where Ivan chose to tell Eric that he had slept with his (Eric's) ex-girlfriend, the one that Eric had been trying to get back together with for the past two months. Eric kicked Ivan's ass, then went straight to my house, where he proceeded to tell my Mom that he left Ivan on the ground, and that the cops had just showed up.

Mom took this about as well as could be expected, which means not very well. She was of course more worried about Ivan than Eric, because Eric was standing in front of her (probably foaming at the mouth) and Ivan, as far as she knew, was laying in a crummy alley on Thayer Street. Eric could not understand her point of view, and let her know that in no uncertain terms what he thought of Ivan and anyone who would even think of defending him, and threatened further violence upon his person should he run into him. Then he took off.

Mom was extremely worked up and called all of my friends (hey guys!) to rally round. She worked herself into such a tizzy that they had to take her to a clinic the next day, where a doctor told her that her heart rate was so high that she could have had a stroke. She gave Mom 3 different prescriptions, including one for an eye infection she had developed (apparently the minute we left), one for her blood pressure, and one for anxiety. She was afraid to take that one, so my friend Matt took one to show her that it was ok.

(!!!!!!!)

For the record, I do not approve of my mother ignoring the advice of a medical professional, and instead choosing to use my close friend as a guinea pig. Just so's you know.

Also, the day after we returned (Sunday) Mom took and extra couple of pills and slept so deeply that she didn't hear either myself or Allen come to the door for 24 hours. I thought she was pissed off and ignoring me - she was drugged out of her mind. I guess the pill anxiety wore off.

Meanwhile, Ivan claimed to be ok, but no one could see him because he had very long hours over the next few days (Read: My face doesn't look so hot and I want to heal up a bit before you see me). He did check in with me to let me know that he was able to finish his shift that night, though he kept getting dizzy and falling over, and was unable to use one arm. Of course, he didn't go to the hospital, because everyone in my family (including myself to some extent) has some "I'm fine, my eyeballs are only bleeding a little" gene. "Doctors, Schmoctors!" we always say. How any of us have reached breeding age is beyond me.

What made things even more excited is that Eric, who had been on the island of Nantucket all summer, now needed a place to stay for a couple of days (with his two kooky roommates, David and Brandon) while he sorted through all of his belongings (which were living in our basement) and chose which things to bring with him on his cross-country move to California. San Francisco specifically. To become Rock Stars.

The problem lay in the fact that the entire time Eric was in town, my Mom lived in mortal fear that he would go after Ivan. Of course, once Eric had cooled down, we all knew he would do nothing of the sort, and he even said as much, but Mom spent each day a miserable, twitchy mess anyway. And Eric kept dragging his stay out - first he was only staying Wednesday night, then Thursday, and then oh, I guess Friday too! They finally left Sunday morning, finally bringing to an end the tearful hand-wringing. And the "why don't you care about your brother?" comments. She was angry with me for being too nice to Eric, since she couldn't understand his actions and thought that I was condoning them.

For the record - I told Eric that I found his actions to be terrible, I could understand his anger, and Hell, I would have taken a swing at the kid, too, but he shouldn't have hurt him so badly, or told his mother such horrible things. Also, Ivan and the girl in question did the deed after she and Eric broke up, but before he tried to get back together with her.

When I see Ivan, I will first make sure he's ok, then I will tell him that he is a pecker-head.

And my dad was calling a million times a day, because if I don't answer the phone he keeps calling, and calling, and calling until I break down and answer the phone, resigning myself to an hour long phone conversation, during which time Mom will try to communicate with me no less than 5 times (Exaggerated whisper: "Is that Dad?") unless I hide in my room.

Allen is really pushing to begin the "Go Back To Maine" campaign on Mom - I'm not sure what to think right now. But I do know that I am jealous of Eric's cross-country move.

So, I'm Back and Stuff.

Tra la. Back from vaca! We had a most righteous time, to borrow a phrase. Pioneer Square, where Seattle was originally built, is a pretty cool place. As a history nerd, I found the underground tour to be fascinating. Seattle was the original Sin City, was built on sawdust and corruption, and general human stupidity. It kind of felt like being at home.

Pike Place Market was definitely all it was cracked up to be. We spent one afternoon running around and collecting the ingredients for a lovely fondue. It was so good, we blew up the fondue pot. Don't ask, I don't remember anything from Physics 101 anymore.

We shopped around, I bought some yarn, we visited the Fremont Troll. That's an actual VW Bug that he's holding.

We went to this sushi place called Blue C that has sushi on a conveyor belt. VERY DANGEROUS. So easy to eat so much sushi! But tasty! And it actually came to about $22 per person, so not so bad.

Also of mega-note to us geeks is the Science Fiction Museum, located under the Space Needle. The museum is part of the personal collection of Paul Allen, of Microsoft fame, and consists of props and first edition hardbound and paperback Sci/Fi novels. There were some excellent videos, and some great interactive displays as well. The best part was the way the museum showed how writers of Science Fiction have predicted many of the serious problems our society is facing today, and how much of Science Fiction serves as a warning against destroying the environment. It was heartening to see the genre taken so seriously. We ended the day by watching Buckaroo Bonzai, though, so I guess we were all done with that whole serious thing.

Anyway, I would like to say that it's good to be back, but - it's not. I will give you an update on Circus Family later on. Right now I am swamped at work. And depressed that House isn't back on until FREAKING NOVEMBER. Stupid Fox!